that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
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