we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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