That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Randomize
