I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Randomize