That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
