great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Is it because I queefed?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
