We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
