508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
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