i would punch a child for taco bell
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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