i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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