Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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