are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
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