somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
