I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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