how can u be prego again
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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