it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
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