Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
