Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Randomize
