Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
