sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
