I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
