she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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