I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
