Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
