we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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