Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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