I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Randomize
