he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Is it penis luge time yet?
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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