Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
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