so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize