Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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