Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
