I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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