Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
