Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize