He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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