He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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