I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
