3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
as a side note pls kill me
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
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