hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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