I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize