you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize