what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
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