Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
