Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
