i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize