and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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