Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
