We're like a lot better than the average bears
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Randomize
