kristin has been a bad kristin
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Randomize
